bouncing back

I wrote about my crushing emotional hangover, but neglected to return for a prompt update: it wore off about 3-4 days later. Life resumed its normal dimensions, and the single night of drinking to excess seemed like no big deal. Is it ideal? Not really, but it was also just one night out of a whole month of mostly reasonable drinking behavior, so overall, things have improved immeasurably for me in 2016.

Depression is a terrible thing, but once it’s gone, everything seems better. And truly, life is pretty good this week. Last weekend, I hiked up the highest mountain in South Dakota. It is not actually a very tall peak, but that sounds more impressive than “went for a nice walk,” so I’m sticking with my original phrasing.

Summer hiking season is just around the corner, and I am impatient. I feel frustrated to still be so slow and heavy, but the truth is, without the constant drinking, I can hike further and faster at any size. I just need to keep reminding myself of that fact while huffing and puffing and wishing I could be 23 again.

It has been three months since I decided to make serious changes to my drinking habits. In that time, I’ve saved hundreds of dollars, I’ve lost a few pounds, and I’ve started to feel like my life is opening up in ways I’d forgotten were possible. More than anything, I am surprised by the feeling of possibility unfolding.


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